Some things just don’t add up

Math isn’t my thing. I’m more of a words guy. But I’m pretty good at simple arithmetic. I can add 2 and 2 just as well as the next guy. But some things just don’t add up.

Who does Rob Ford think he is, anyway? The mayor of Toronto admitted to smoking crack. He also admitting to buying drugs in the last two years. But does he resign in disgrace? Of course not. While many in Canada have suggested he go to rehab, he said “no, no, no.” Instead he’s going to run for re-election.

The vast majority of Torontonians — 72 per cent, in fact — call Ford's insistence on remaining in office after he admitted to smoking crack cocaine "not acceptable," according to a new Ipsos poll. Of course the only poll that counts is the one on election day. But still.

Does Ford think he’s the mayor of an American city? Say, Washington D.C.? It’s been said that only Nixon could go to China and only Marion Barry could smoke crack and get re-elected. Of course, Barry had a valid excuse. B**** set him up. It’s worth noting that America’s most famous crack-smoking mayor still serves on the D.C. city council.

Does Ford think he’s Charlie Sheen? The movie and TV star admitted in 2011 to smoking crack. While his crazy antics lost him his “men card,” he didn’t lose a step career-wise and actually picked up a lot of new followers through the ordeal. I rather imagine that Rob Ford hopes to be “winning” in the near future. Oddly, I note that Sheen tweeted something of a love note to Ford on Thursday (http://tinyurl.com/n93w95j) apologizing for the media portrayal of the mayor.

Really, I have no idea what’s going on up in Canada but it sure is fun to watch. Honestly it’s just fun to watch another country look stupid for a change.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that the U.S. of A. has gotten out of its own way. In fact, Obamacare is a number crunches dream — or nightmare, depending on whether you crunch your numbers from the right or the left.

According to an Avalere Health report released Thursday, a whopping 3 percent of those expected to have signed up for the Affordable Care Act exchanges have done so. In New York, it’s a mere 2 percent.

For all the effort the Republicans have put into thwarting Obamacare, they could have simply let it self destruct on its own. It reminds me of H.G. Wells’ “War of the Worlds.” The world’s armies have no effect whatsoever on the invading aliens and their superior technology. But a simple cold? Humanity-1, aliens-0.

As I’ve stated before, I admire the theory behind Obamacare. I believe that we have every right to be healthy. But the implementation by this president has been horrific. And his “out-of-touch-ness” seems to radiate from everything he’s “involved in” lately. His motto should be “I didn’t know that” as he seems to be out of every loop in the beltway and beyond.

But hey, we only have three more years to deal with Obama and then we’ll have a new president who might actually make some headway on health care — like she tried to do 20 years ago. Unless she’s attacked by aliens before that. Or becomes friends with Rob Ford. But that wouldn’t add up, now would it?

Scott Leffler occasionally name drops in his columns for search engine optimization. Play Station 4, Iran, Andy Kaufman. Follow him on Twitter @scottleffler.