Memories are better when you share them

With New York's first gay marriage taking place just down the river from our house, how could the kids and I not go? Sure, it was at midnight and yeah, there were a lot of people and a throng of press-types. But this was history in the making. And even more importantly, my girls wanted to go see it happen.

So Saturday evening we piled into the car and headed to Luna Island to watch the state's first gay wedding, taking place at midnight between Kitty Lambert and Cheryle Rudd.

The ceremony itself was somewhat short ... and Niagara Falls Mayor Paul Dyster had to slow down, improvise, wait for applause, and just plain pause just to make sure he didn't get "I now pronounce you legally married" out of his voicebox until after midnight.

And when he did, the crowd roared loudly.

Following the ceremony, the brides talked to the press and mingled with the crowd, many of them strangers to the women, self included. They were gracious and seemed thrilled with the response they received.

There was also a ceremony of hope that the nation's 44 states that don't recognize same-sex marriages would change their tune. My oldest was thrilled that she was one of 22 people who got to take part in that ceremony. It's something she'll never forget.

And really, that's what it's all about for me and my girls. We try to experience life in a way worth remembering. We try to live a life worth remembering.

Earlier Saturday, we had gone to Tonawanda Island and toured the Nina and Pinta. We added them to the other famous boats we'd toured before, including the Amistad and the Mayflower. We joked that all we needed was the Titanic and we'd have all the boats on our checklist.

There is actually a checklist. A bucket list, if you will. It includes the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and the Kentucky Derby. This weekend, I also added the 2012 Olympics in London to my checklist. I've never been abroad and what better reason to visit Europe than for the Olympics.

In the past few years, we've knocked some pretty major ones off our checklist, including the inauguration of President Barack Obama, which I took my oldest daughter to. I had decided before the election itself that I wanted to go to the inauguration, whether Obama had won or whether it was John McCain. I was particularly happy that Obama won because it meant my daughter wanted to come with me, making the memorable moment that much better. “We were there” is a much more meaningful statement than “I was there.”

We also attended Groundhog Day in Punxsutawney, which I surprised the whole family with. My girls will remember that it was cold. But they'll certainly remember it. And I'll remember Punxsutawney, as well as Phil. But moreso, I'll remember being there with my family.

Life is more than about getting through it. It's about making memories with those you love. For me, that means doing things that are different … and doing them with my beautiful daughters.

I hope everyone has someone to make memories with.

Kitty and Cheryle do. And my daughters and I think that's awesome.

Debt compromise needed

Fear is a great motivator. No one knows this better than politicians.

The fear mongering going on in the halls of Congress and the Sunday morning news shows these days is at its absolute peak over the debt limit crisis.

To understand some talk about it, if we don't raise our debt limit, we won't be able pay our bills and the United States may be repossessed by China or whoever it is we owe that $14.3 trillion to.

Listening to the other side, they say the American people have called them directly and begged them not to raise the debt ceiling, for fear of devolving into a socialist state, complete with our own Karl Marx.

Truth is, I've heard very few people discuss the debt ceiling. Maybe you have, but I doubt it. I'd imagine that most of us don't entirely understand it. I know I don't. I have to trust what I read and hear … while trying not to have nightmares about us becoming either the Socialist States of America or the People's Republic of America. I must say that it seems funny, either way we become a communist state. So capitalism lead to communism. Hmmph.

This great red scare that our nation's right wing seems to be promoting just seems laughable to me, quite honestly. I've heard so many people call President Obama a socialist over the past couple years. And all because it's drilled into their heads by the likes of Fox News, talk radio and rapid email alerts.

I have no concerns whatsoever about the president leading us down the trail to communism. No more than I think he's a secret Muslim born in Kenya. Sadly, maybe I should point out that I don't think he's a secret Muslim born in Kenya … since some people do.

Defaulting on our loans, however, that sounds like it has some serious consequences. I know if you go over your credit limit on your credit card … or fail to make a payment, they jack your interest rates up. I don't really want $14 trillion in debt with high interest. That sounds unmanageable.

Of course, to be honest, I don't really want $14 trillion in debt.

It seems to me that a compromise is needed. The debt ceiling must be raised. But the debt also needs to be lowered. Sustaining payments on $14 trillion in debt is just unsustainable. It means we owe $46,000 for every man, woman and child in the country.

That can't stand.

I'd hope that our leaders would raise the debt ceiling while hammering out a plan to reduce long-term debt, so we don't have to have this conversation again next year.

And in the spirit of compromise, I think that everything should be on the table. That includes tax increases, military spending and Social Security. I bet most people my age don't really believe it's going to be there when we retire anyway.